The C word is taboo around here — and it’s not the obscene one. Proper Berkeley etiquette demands uttering Happy Holidays or, ignoring the whole holiday completely, and just saying, Happy New Year’s.
Prior to a few months ago, I was one of them, a person who practically growled at anyone who said, Merry Christmas. Truth be told, I had a serious attitude about Christmas.
Okay, if I’m being completely honest here, I was a first class Scrooge. Christmas, in my opinion? Ba Humbug!
There were only two rituals that I engaged in religiously: ranting and raving. My emoting would begin the moment I’d hear the first notes of a Christmas song.
I was usually in a department store with my husband around Thanksgiving. Suddenly, I’d hear the first chords: “Santa Claus is coming to town,” or something similar. I would groan loudly to my husband, “OMG, it is only November 25th, And they are already starting with this [censored] Christmas music.”
My husband, a secular Jew too, but one who likes Christmas music, would shoot me a look. He’d snap, “I don’t want to hear about it,” to which I would storm off to another part of the store.
A week or so later, there’d be the repeat of the scene. Different song, different store, same response. “I am going to lose my frigging mind if I hear one more Christmas song,” to which my long suffering mate would try, in vain, to shut me up.
Eventually, I’d wear him down, and go on a full rant about how unfair it is that I have to be subjected to Christmas music, not to mention, long lines at the store, and a day (Christmas) where every place I want to go to is closed. At this point, my man is so numbed out, that he would just stare into space, trying his best to block me out.
So that has been my yearly ritual. Oh, along with Chinese food. Traditionally, Jews go out to a Chinese restaurant on Christmas. This is where my family headed each year, to our local place, which was overflowing with Jewish families on Christmas.
But the last few months have been life altering for me. While I had a political conversion and became a conservative two years ago, the last few months I’ve gone through some momentous spiritual changes.
While I was always adamantly opposed to traditional Judaism and Christianity, I actually decided to see what they were all about. Rather than base my beliefs on prejudice, I started attending services; I’ve even been reading the Bible.
I’ve been to seven churches in all, as well as one synagogue. Since I was raised a secular Jew, without the religion, I had never been to temple before.
These holy places have been the most heart-warming and stirring experiences. Attending services has literally changed my life. I’ve also realized what I’ve been missing all these years.
And now I understand my antagonism towards Christmas; it wasn’t my holiday. I felt left-out, alienated. It was as though the entire country were engaged in the party of the year — and actually, they were. Everyone but me, it seemed, was invited. People were buying trees, putting up lights, and immersed in God and family. And then afterwards, they had all these new presents!
But this year I don’t feel like such an outsider. For the first time in my life, Christmas feels like my holiday too. I get to go to the party as well if I want to. And I realize now that no one was ever stopping me from joining in the festivities. Oh, I guess there was one person stopping me, the former Scrooge — me.
So this Christmas, I am doing things I’ve never done before. I’ve been wishing people a Merry Christmas, a truly un-PC act. And, shockingly, I’m actually enjoying the Christmas music in stores, and humming along. I even created a station on Pandora to listen to Christmas music on my computer!
This year, I plan to savor my first Christmas, a Judeo-Christian blend of my own making On Christmas Eve, I hope to attend services at my favorite church, a large, diverse, and welcoming place. And on Christmas day, my honey and I will head out to our favorite Chinese restaurant.
Robin of Berkeley
Robin is a recovering liberal, and a licensed psychotherapist who lives in Berkeley, California. The above information is intended for entertainment and educational purposes, rather than to offer any kind of definitive diagnoses.Visit Robin’s blog.
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