Michael from IL - Great Quotes

Mark Twain

Samuel Langhorne Clemens (November 30, 1835 – April 21, 1910), better known by his pen name Mark Twain, was an American author and humorist.

He is most noted for his novels, The Adventures of Tom Sawyer (1876), and its sequel, Adventures of Huckleberry Finn (1885), the latter often called "the Great American Novel."

Twain grew up in Hannibal, Missouri, which would later provide the setting for Huckleberry Finn and Tom Sawyer. He apprenticed with a printer. He also worked as a typesetter and contributed articles to his older brother Orion's newspaper. After toiling as a printer in various cities, he became a master riverboat pilot on the Mississippi River, before heading west to join Orion. He was a failure at gold mining, so he next turned to journalism.

He achieved great success as a writer and public speaker. His wit and satire earned praise from critics and peers, and he was a friend to presidents, artists, industrialists, and European royalty.

1. "In my many years I have come to a conclusion that one useless man is a shame, two is a law firm and three or more is a congress."
   John Adams


2. "If you don't read the newspaper you are uninformed, if you do read the newspaper you are misinformed."
   Mark Twain


3. "Suppose you were an idiot And suppose you were a member of Congress But then I repeat myself."
   Mark Twain


4. "I contend that for a nation to try to talk itself into prosperity is like a man standing in a bucket and trying to lift himself up by the handle."
   Winston Churchill


5. "A government which robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul."
   George Bernard Shaw


6. "A liberal is someone who feels a great debt to his fellow man, which debt he proposes to pay off with your money."
   G. Gordon Liddy


7. "Democracy must be something more than two wolves and a sheep voting on what to have for dinner."
   James Bovard, Civil Libertarian (1994)


8. "Foreign aid might be defined as a transfer of money from poor people in rich countries to rich people in poor countries."
   Douglas Casey, Classmate of Bill Clinton at Georgetown University


9. "Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys."
   P.J. O'Rourke, Civil Libertarian


10. "Government is the great fiction, through which everybody endeavors to live at the expense of everybody else."
    Frederic Bastiat, French economist (1801-1850)


11. "Government's view of the economy could be summed up in a few short phrases: If it moves, tax it If it keeps moving, regulate it And if it stops moving, subsidize it."
    Ronald Reagan (1986)


12. "I don't make jokesI just watch the government and report the facts."
    Will Rogers


13. "If you think health care is expensive now, wait until you see what it costs when it's free!
    P.J. O'Rourke


14. "In general, the art of government consists of taking as much money as possible from one party of the citizens to give to the other."
    Voltaire (1764)


15. "Just because you do not take an interest in politics doesn't mean politics won't take an interest in you!"
    Pericles (430 B.C.)


16. "No man's life, liberty, or property is safe while the legislature is in session."
    Mark Twain (1866)


17. "Talk is cheap. except when Congress does it."
    Anonymous


18. "The government is like a baby's alimentary canal, with a happy appetite at one end and no responsibility at the other."
    Ronald Reagan


19. "The inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of the blessingsThe inherent blessing of socialism is the equal sharing of misery."
    Winston Churchill


20. "The only difference between a tax man and a taxidermist is that the taxidermist leaves the skin."
    Mark Twain


21. "The ultimate result of shielding men from the effects of folly is to fill the world with fools."
    Herbert Spencer, English Philosopher (1820-1903)


22. "There is no distinctly native American criminal class...save Congress"
    Mark Twain


23. "What this country needs are more unemployed politicians."
    Edward Langley, Artist (1928-1995)


24. "A government big enough to give you everything you want, is strong enough to take everything you have."
    Thomas Jefferson


25. "We hang the petty thieves and appoint the great ones to public office."
    Aesop

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